shld i ?

Hav been asking myself every moment of my life...Shld I?...or Shld i not?...i was in a confuse state...i dun wish to affect anyone's life...y issit so difficult... i dun wish to be lyk tat... every time i step into my life y issit so miserable... not knowing the true ans... it seem good for me not to noe the ans but in other way it oso seem not good for not knowing the ans... is all lies with "shld i or shld i not"...my life is getting better i guess...my old self is coming back...issit a good sign?...or issit bad?... but the onli prob im facing nw is "shld i or shld i not"... im so afraid things will be different after knowing the truth... will life be totally different? hav been pondering... lately...who am i? or hu do u tink am i?...y issit so difficult... i dun wan history to happen again tats all... im so afraid... i always wanted to express my emotion out...but i din...i dun wish to affect others... i jux wan it to be in me... y issit so hard?... haiz no one will understand wat i wrote above oso no point writing down